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This game is certainly extremely unfriendly to new players. Very few things actually indicate what they seem, and there is little you can actually do about it aside from what has been described above. Otherwise you'll be stuck playing custom matches and interviewing every player to the best of your ability.
My advice (if what you're describing is playing with friends who are new to the game): Do not play multiplayer with your (new) friends against other players. Play against each other in 1v1s and if you're as lucky as I have been: periodical 2v2s. That is the best way you can really introduce new players to this game: mentor them into it.
Once they're feeling more proficient at the game and it's many hidden nuances and interactions, go into the fray with them.
But subjecting a new player to CoH2's multiplayer is rather sadistic.
